in all my life, be glorified;

Mar 2, 2009

WOWSERS.

Wow, it's been long since i blogged.

For the past few weeks my life seemed like a drama of sorts - Ups and downs, backstabbing, redemption and renewal of the spirit.
It's weird though, looking back in restropect, how a few weeks can zoom past without one giving it much consideration.

The weeks have gone past without much productivity - academically.

Rolland keeps track of my study hours.
Sadly speaking, if only he had numbers to log down on my column.
BT1 is next week, and here i am - BLOGGING.
Not even studying, for Christ's sake.

GP.
Chemistry.
Mathematics.
Economics.
Literature.

BANES.

Posted at 07:39 pm by extradelicious
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Feb 15, 2009

MY NEWEST ANTHEM! :D

CHRIS TOMLIN - YOU LIFTED ME OUT

Verse 1
You turned my way
You heard my cry
You turned my mourning into shouting
Sorrow may last for a night
But with the light I am seeing
I am singing

Chorus
You lifted me out
You lifted me out
And set me dancing, dancing
Free, now I am free
Your love rescued me
Now it’s the anthem I’m singing

Verse 2
Many will see
Many will hear
And find You strong enough to save
Many the wonders You have done
Your light has come, I am singing
I am singing

Chorus
You lifted me out
You lifted me out
And set me dancing, dancing
Free, now I am free
Your love rescued me
Now it’s the anthem I’m singing

Bridge
Lost is where You found me
Shattered and frail
But You love me still
Trouble may surround me
My heart may fail
But You never will
You never will

Chorus
You lifted me out
You lifted me out
And set me dancing, dancing
Free, now I am free
Your love rescued me
Now it’s the anthem I’m singing

Posted at 08:30 pm by extradelicious
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Feb 12, 2009

Dear God

Dear God,

It's been hard lately.
I'm tired of work overload, and committments ever ravaging through my schedule.
It's Thursday, and i can't seem to hold on for one more week.

I'm excited for tmr, i'm excited for sat,
But God, i really need You more in my life.
I've been neglecting You lately, and i realize that without Your power and strength to sustain me,
I really can't hold on.

I'm tired of school and everything else.
Nothing in this world matters except You and the people You've placed close to my heart.
Bless and protect them Lord, keep them and sustain them,
Just as You've sustained me over the last week.
I trust You Lord, please, help my family too.

I love You and i need You Lord.
Just like You've said in Your Word, that if i have the faith as small as a mustard seed, i CAN move mountains IN YOUR NAME.

"Lord don't move that mountain, give me strength to climb it".

Posted at 11:34 pm by extradelicious
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Feb 11, 2009

Great Expectations

That day i attended Mrs Tan's lecture on Great Expectations (finally, they've started),
And suddenly the idea of "coming full circle" imprinted itself in my mind.
I've been thinking about it the past two days (almost nonstop).
How connections are made;
How the beginning already foreshadows the end,
The randomousity of people.
Maybe our life is one big literature text, and there's someone reading about you right now (Stranger Than Fiction, haha).

This blog used to be so happy, and now it's so depressing.
Ah well, school does that to the best of people.

Let's have a happy picture to lighten the mood.

I think it's true that Lit students think too much.
TOO MUCH.

On a brighter albeit nonsensical/random note:

I own Bryan at DJMax. Hehe.
I love those Warcraft/Diablo/Starcraft CGI thingies Blizzard does.

Time to catch up on work.

***********************************************************************************************

One moonlit midnight, a boy and a girl walked home.
They missed the last bus, and had no choice but to brave the howling wind of the night.
The girl fumbled and limped as she walked, and the boy, although paying notice to their conversation, asked,

"What's wrong? Are you okay?"
"Yeah, it's just my new shoes. They're giving me blisters."

Without a word, he halted in his tracks while she obliviously she carried on.
He came running after her.

"Here. Wear this."

In his hand he held a pair of socks, in his other hand he lifted up a pair of shoes.
She declined and walked on.
He pulled her and shoved the shoes into her arms.

After she had slid her feet into his size 11 shoes, she wriggled her toes in the emptyness of each shoe.
He held her hand, and carried on walking barefoot against the gravel ground, holding her pair of heels.

Walking for twenty minutes, she could sense his pain from walking on the stony floor with his bare feet.

"Wear your shoes back."

He looked in the distance.

Taking off his shoes on her feet, she felt disappointed at his eagerness to have his shoes back.
Walking across the traffic light, she noticed a construction site right beside her.

"Hold my bag."

She held onto his bag, while he hoisted her up on his back, walking past the construction site, all the way home.

"Bye. Goodnight."

(:
I LOVE YOU! :

Posted at 05:26 pm by extradelicious
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Feb 9, 2009

What if my time had went, would you spend yours?

The first day of school after Orientation sucked.
I'm harbouring so many of my secrets, afraid of my family finding out.
I'm scared of letting people know - and in that process of shutting ppl up i offend even more people.

I'm tired - tired of school (lectures & tutorials), council, tests, Bryan, PE (training) etc.
I'm just exhausted.
Now let me sleep.

Posted at 09:17 pm by extradelicious
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Feb 8, 2009

With School On Monday... ...

I don't even know where to begin.

Orientation was a blast, it was much funner than i expected (and much more tiring too).
The week flew past though, and monday's gonna be here real soon.
I'm tired, i admit, and i really really don't wanna go back to lectures and tutorials.

I've strayed away from my friends, my boyfriend, my family for the past week.
I haven't talked to them (meaningfully) for the past week.
I miss them.

I don't know why,
But why the sudden coldness?
The sudden revelation of having noone beside you - to comfort you, to hear your sorrows, to lend you a crying shoulder?
I've suddenly lost all that - in a span of a week.

I stay up thinking - why in the world did i do that?

Posted at 03:13 am by extradelicious
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Feb 4, 2009

WORRIED

Despite all the busy-ness in Orientation,
All the fatigue and weariness,
All the fun and games,
Love from OG32,

At the end of the day,
I REALLY WONDER:

CHAR, HOW ARE YOU?
WONG, ARE YOU ALRIGHT?
SIHUI, HOW'S YOUR DAY?

These are the friends that matter.
And i miss talking to you guys cause im so tired to reply your msges when i reach home.

Charmaine Wong!!! There has been nothing from you! ):
Im worried.

Posted at 11:14 pm by extradelicious
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Feb 1, 2009

Regret

In this one week,
I faced a multitude of regret.

Nothing i can change.
But what if i had...?

What ifs never work, and never will.
All i can do now, is pray for her safety.

THE ARROW & THE SONG
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

I shot an arrow into the air,
It fell to earth, I knew not where;
For, so swiftly it flew, the sight
Could not follow it in its flight.

I breathed a song into the air,
It fell to earth, I knew not where;
For who has sight so keen and strong,
That it can follow the flight of song?

Long, long afterward, in an oak
I found the arrow, still unbroke;
And the song, from beginning to end,
I found again in the heart of a friend.

Charmaine Wong, pm/text/email me quick :/

Posted at 11:25 pm by extradelicious
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Final Goodbye

I couldn't believe how stoned i was at the airport.
My surroundings seemed so surreal, and my mind was blank of emotions.
When we met in my mum's car i was still happy-go-lucky,
Still believing that there was still time.

At 9.30pm, you decided to go.
I wasn't prepared.
I never talked to you abt this, i never helped you get over your fear.
I just encouraged you, silently.
The magnitude of emotions hit me when i hugged you, right before you went into the immigration point.
I was taken aback, cause i had this whole slew of words to tell you, but tears choked me and i couldnt say a word.

We waved goodbye from behind the glass,
Watching your every move.
You turned back 3, 4 times? And every single time, i felt myself getting pulled apart from you.
I called you after, and i started to cry again.

Take care of yourself.
Don't get fat.
Study hard.

That's all i could think of.
There was just too much to say, too many thoughts overflowing my mind.
Take care. Don't get fat. Study hard.
I know you will. (:

GOODBYE CHARMAINE WONG YUTING.
When you come back, we'll be an adult cellgroup already and 24 years YOUNG.

I'll miss you though.

Posted at 12:24 am by extradelicious
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Jan 30, 2009

Goodbyes

I've had the feeling of someone walk out of my life (literally) once before.
That day i cried and cried, as if a part of me had left.

For the past few days i've been having council cause Orientation's about to begin.
There's so much to do and so little time.
To say i enjoy staying back to do council stuff would definitely be a lie.
I would rather invest my time in somewhere more impt, or someone more impt to me.

Someone who would willingly take a backseat in my life,
And not domineeringly step in to invade my timetable, to INSIST i spend time with her,
Yet always be there when i needed her.
She was always free for me, but i never was for her.
Even during her last month and weeks in Singapore, i could never vacate a timeslot just for her.
What a friend.

Someone who's been with me through thick and thin.
Someone i've had arguments and quarrels with.
Someone who could put up with me not spending time with her.
Someone who understands me, talks to me, helps me.

In about 12 hours, im gonna lose her.
She's not ever gonna bother me to buy her more SAJC stuff again.

And right now, im trying to rush her present.
What kind of friend does that, tell me.

A busy one.

Posted at 11:28 pm by extradelicious
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